Why girls become a dilemma for parents?

By Qurat-ul-Ain Hassan

It is said that when God created daughters; He took special care to find the precious treasure that would make them sweet & fair. Allah has given daughters the Smile of Angels. He gave daughters everything that is nice. God smiled when he created daughters because He knew that He created pure love & happiness for parents. It is also said that when God gets very happy; HE gifts parents the angels in form of “daughters”.

Daughters are the blessing and the most beautiful creature of Allah Almighty It is said that “a daughter is a bundle of firsts that excite and delight giggles that come from deep inside and are always contagious, everything wonderful and precious and your love for her knows no bounds.”

Whether daughter is a little girl or a grown-up woman, she’ll always remain as girl for her parents and will hold a special place in her parent’s heart. Some unknown authors said that “It’s probably from your daughter that you learned about the sweetness and spice of little girls. It’s also from her that you learned about patience and forgiveness, as she stretched your tolerance with the sulky attitude of a teenage girl.”

According to Euripides “To a father growing old nothing is dearer than a daughter.

A daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart.” I think a daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future. A daughter is a day brightener and a heart warmer. A daughter who is very dainty and debonair and a blessing of God, becomes dilemma for her parents, HOW COULD IT POSSIBLE???

But yes our abominate society makes it possible. And being a part of this society, girls cannot express themselves; they ar4 not given their rights. And they are not allowed to fight for their rights. Whatever the situation is, girls are supposed to just remain silent in every situation. Because her family is everything for her, she cannot defame them.

She thinks about everybody, but who will think about a Girl or about a Daughter?

Who is just considered as a burden on society WE Daughters are “Proud” for our parents then why girls are not given importance??? Why girls become a source of trouble for their parents?? I think these are questions which every girl thinks about. I don’t understand that why whenever we want to take any step in our lives by our own choice, we have to give a lot of answers. Our lives revolve around only two words; those two words are “WillY” and “NO”.

This “Why” and “No” is very major and important aspect of our dainty lives, which doesn’t allow us to do things by our own way… This is also because we are GIRLS and we are Daughters. IS this our mistake that we are “Girls” and daughters”???? No, this is not our mistake at all, because we are beautiful and lively creature of Allah. But yes, somehow, being a part of this curious and selfish society, this is our mistake that we are daughters. But again what are the reasons behind becoming Quandary for our parents?? Well, if I say this is just a question then what is not found in this question?

The feeling of MISFOR- TUNE; The feeling of DEBILITATION; the feeling of DISCOURAGEMENT, the feeling of GUILT; and last but not the least the feeling of DEBARATION from our rights, every thing and feeling found in this question that why we girls become trail for our parents.

After these feelings every satisfactory word denied to give favor of tongue and strange sadness has caught heart. These feelings/words are from a girl’s heart that is well aware of her rights but couldn’t ask for them. Why she starts to think that daughters are source of trouble for their parents? Parents spend a lot of money for their daughter’s best rooming, they tried all their best to save their daughters from all evils, but soon a time come when daughters become burden for their parents and that is time “before marriage.”

This is a reality, which cannot be denied that whether a girl is daughter of an emperor or of a poor man she has to get married. A girl has to get married in every situation and according to our Religion, our parents and we daughters are bound of this.

So after providing good life style, good education, manners, parents start to find a balanced and proper proposal for their daughters. During this where the parents have to complete! Finish their liabilities, they have also feared of letting their daughters in someone’s hand who is a stranger. And if because of some reasons parents get procrastinate to marry their daughters then the pinching words which the parents are supposed to listen from so- called relatives are furious which make parents’ life difficult to live.

The people get a topic and start to criticize daughters in a very taunting style. Different types of stupid questions are being asked from parents as well as from daughters.

Because of such type of questions and situation; a daughters start to think that “yes”; she is a source of trouble for her parents and really she deserved damnation of the people of her society where from she belongs. I don’t know why the people of our society make it their business if someone’s daughter is not 1 getting married. I personally think this is none of their business. I think, perhaps the people who asked stupid questions to the daughters and their parents had forgotten that the “human struggle come true when the destiny collaborate with the human struggle.”

I don’t know why people take interest if someone’s daughter is getting late for marriage. Why they try to make fun of that girl, who has no mistake if she is not getting married. If the parents find difficulties to find suitable and balanced proposal for their daughters there is also involvement and mistake of our society, who has high standards and doesn’t allow the parents or girls to live in a vivacious way.

I can’t understand who makes our society vouch. Who will extirpate the stupid traditions which are formed only for the girls, from our society? When Will these societies stop to dispute Wamen? When will this society provide the rights to the women? It is said that daughter of everybody is equal. So just finished such differences from our minds and save the daughters from psychological problems in which they start to suffer by after listening the disgusting views for her.

You can ask about her proposal settlements in a very polite way your little encouragement can make start to live her life ma better way. And this struggle will make you respected and no girl will talk in disputed way and never think of herself as a trouble for her parents…!!!!
Source: The Nation
Date:12/2/2009